glumshoe:

knitmeapony:

glumshoe:

A little girl showed me the bandaid on her hand, so I showed her the scrape on my knuckle and IMMEDIATELY four or five small children flicked over to come see my injury. They were so eager to behold my blood.

“The children were eager to behold my blood” is definitely a solid way to start a story.

They left disappointed when they saw it was just a weird scab.

somecutething:

A gentle old man 👴🏼

laymansterms12:

This still makes me laugh whenever I think about it

lesbianfemmefatale:

Ok normally I hate the edgy “what if everyone in this children’s show was actually DEAD and in the AFTERLIFE” type thing but. Total drama island is DEFINITELY set in Hell